Pon. What is wrong with these people? They keep turning into or making holograms of Steven’s mom! Stop it!
Oto. Yuritastic. Sorry. That wasn’t 90s enough for adding -tastic to the end of a word. YURITASTIC!!!
Pon. You have to spell it with seven Zs and at least one X. Believe me, man. I was there. I was there.
Oto. More than 5,000 years ago during the great gem war.
Pon. No. In the 90s. I saw shit you wouldn’t believe. Pogs. For the love of all things good in this world. Pogs.
Oto. Yeah, man! Pogs. I remember you had a pog maker. That was the shit. Anyway. Does Lion like it when you put everything in the universe into his mane? Is he okay with that? I guess he wouldn’t mind. He is Steven’s mom after all.
Pon. He’s not Steven’s mom! Everybody else apparently is, though. Or keeps a 3D model of her in their skull.
Oto. I feel a little bad for Pearl. She never got farther than yuri friend … I’m glad we’re providing deep and meaningful commentary on the shows we watch.
Pon. What are we supposed to say about Steven Universe? This is something I struggle with every week. Do we just do straightforward plot summary? Okay, Pearl’s lady friend died and everywhere she looks she’s reminded of her.
Pon. I’m just saying, it’s not that deep of a show, but it’s a raw show. There’s not that much to talk about, but there’s a lot to, uh, feel about.
Oto. I like Steven’s reaction to Pearl being kind of a dick. Instead of getting mad he just gets worried about her. Steven’s a good kid.
Pon. Oh, there’s an interesting thing in 46. Greg’s struggling to write a song, but then Steven brings in the thing you need to make art that isn’t just masturbatory garbage: empathy. Granted, it’s not weird that he’d do so. That’s his thing. But I like that it’s presented in this way. That’s my thing.
Oto. Greg Universe is badass. Just sayin. He’s pretty great.
Pon. It’s a shame that Meat Loaf is too old to play him.
Oto. Yeah, but Jack Black isn’t.